2006-11-17

Spit where you piss

I've noticed that some men upon visiting a urinal initiate the process by first spitting into it, sometimes hocking up a collection of phlegm to make it really count. I've noticed some doing it every time we happen to visit the men's room together. I'm not in the routine of doing this and for some reason today I was pondering the possible reasons for the practice. Could it be for one of these reasons?
  • physiological: perhaps some class of males have excited salivary glands that overproduce when the bladder gets full.
  • pavlovian: perhaps something about urinals and urinating subconsciously makes some men's mouths water.
  • practicality: perhaps some men dislike excess saliva but are too cultured to spit just anywhere so they save it until they hit the men's room where it is a reasonable place to expel the excess.
  • habit: perhaps nights at the pub or restaurant where one sometimes feels the need to clear the palette, and practically so in the men's room, has created a routine that keeps going.
  • image: maybe it's considered cool or there's a secret society where spitting in the urinal is a call sign.
I've seen it happen mostly at bars and eating establishments but also at work and other public places. Every once in a while it occurs to me to maybe do it myself. But, like most women I observe, I don't spit very often. I wonder, do women do anything like this when they visit the restrooms?

10 comments:

Mulysa said...

hahaha! this is quite possibly the funniest post i think you've ever written...

were you drinking? is it beer friday?

ummm.. were you trying to be funny?

mikshir said...

it was indeed beer friday at work but i posted this before my first beer.

caninecologne said...

speaking as a chick, i do not spit into the toilet when going to the bathroom. if anything, i will spit, or hock a logie into a napkin or tissue.

bert wolfe said...

There are guys at my work that do this as well. I'm not sure why either. I don't do this myself. I would venture to go with "practicality" since this is a work environment. Perhaps the cheap coffee that's provided by my company causes a build up of phlegm during the day. The only recourse is to get rid of it during a bio-break. Spitting into a trash can may not be received by co-workers very well. I'll try it sometime and see what reactions I get.

HotFudge said...

Hmmm, I wonder if this is an old european ritual that somehow made its way to the states. I'll have to ask Screg if he's ever encountered anyone spitting before urinating in the john.

HotFudge said...

ifsatg, hopefully that empty coffee cup is yours.

Mulysa said...

i wonder how much brainstorming it took them to figure out how to block your airborne sputum...

ScregMan said...

Here's a recipe:

Take some nice, firm yet solid phlegm. Not the watery saliva stuff, but some of the really hard stuff...

Roll it around in some seasoned flour.

Then deep fry it.

Anonymous said...

[HRRRMMMM... Can't seem to comment under my blogger name...]

Baking sounds good, but would it hold together in the oven? I was thinking the combination of flour and oil would "encase" the phlegm. Thus, you'd have a nice ball of phlegm sealed in a crunchy shell.

On another note, I was at a restaurant fairly recently. There was a waste basket next to the toilet. What did I see when I glanced down? Someone had wiped their ass and thrown the TP into the trashcan instead of into the toilet. WTF?!

On another note, I assume most bowel movements come out like logs (more or less). But every once in awhile, I will walk into a public restroom, and see doo doo splattered (yes, splattered) on the inner sides of the bowl. I am more amused than grossed out when I see something like this because I wonder: "How is this splatter pattern achieved? What's this guy been eatin'?" I mean, for the most part, crap should fall straight down, right? But for it to break apart into smaller pieces and dispurse and spread at various angles... hmmmmmmmmmmmmm...

-Screg

mikshir said...

I remember in Beijing something I read where in many hotels patrons were requested to dispose of their toilet paper in wastebins at the side of the toilet instead of the toilet itself, since the sewage system was not capable of handling it otherwise. Luckily my hotel had a special treatment tank (I think that's what it was) and it was allowed.

As for the splatter patterns. Screg, your diet must be too good or you're too healthy for this to be an intrigue to you. But rest comfortably that there are indeed equations that govern the laws of built up gas behind solid yet crumbable materials.