2006-08-22
Kim
I've been living with some heaviness for many days with the news of the passing of Kim Perez. I knew her first as the kid sister of a good friend back in junior and high. It wasn't until she moved to the Boston area for graduate school several years ago that she promoted from a friend's sister to a direct friend. I remember chuckling at her gentle correction of me to call her "Kim" when I called her "Kimby", the kid name she was known as when we were much younger. She bunked at my place for a month or two while she looked for her own dwelling near Tufts. We hung out now and then, I helped her move and collect items, my having a car. During an occasional lull in the semester I'd hear from her and we'd go to a cafe, or a jazz bar, or just for a walk to chat. Towards the end of her stay, she'd angle me with her grad school anxieties, of which I was eminantly familiar and I'd say what I could to allay most concerns. Ultimately and finally she chose the path to a doctorate degree and then as suddenly as she arrived, off she was again to Michigan. I remember feeling a little let down to have lost a local friend, she was part of a batch that left in fact. We didn't get to meet as often as I'd like unfortunately, owing to semesters and the vacations in between. But I always appreciated it when we did have the time to connect and futher still when she kept in touch with her on-going adventures afterwards. I'd always been impressed by her drive and indomitable spirit; she did indeed follow her passions. I marvelled at the travelling she'd done, the places she'd seen, her stint in the Peace Corps, and her decision to apply her experience and interests towards an advanced degree. Not many do, especially from my old neighborhood. I was delighted at the email I received earlier this year noting that she had been awarded a Fulbright and would be off to do field research. I confess that I harbored some small pride thinking that perhaps I made the smallest of contributions to a budding promising career with our talks. I looked forward to following her accomplishments; I insisted that I get a copy of her dissertation when completed. And I'm saddened that it will not be so. It is a tragedy for the walk of such a promising and life-affirming individual to be stopped so young. My heart goes out to her, K, and their family.
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Indeed, it is truly sad someone such as Kim has a life cut short, inexplicably.
Although I too, knew her as our good friend's "little sister", I appreciated knowing her through the years, despite the few contacts. I was looking through old photographs a few nights ago...she escorted her older brother at our wedding reception eleven years ago. She was so young then. Later on during the reception, she was among the "single" women who were on the floor waiting to catch the bridal bouquet. I had a few snaps of those as well. The funny thing is that her old high school counselor, a friend of mine, ended up catching the bouquet.
A few years ago, we spoke on the phone and emailed several times about our Boston trip (Spring 03) when we went to visit you. I appreciated her advice and only regret that we were not able to meet when we were in the area due to conflicting schedules.
I admired her willingness to go "out of her comfort zone". As you alluded, many in our old neighborhood do not tend to do that. They play the safe route, stay home and go to a local college. Not Kim. She went off to UCSC, the Peace Corps (wow), then Tufts, then MSU and Africa. The very fact that she got an MA and was on her way to a Phd was awesome. Many at the old neighborhood don't aspire to go beyond high school or even college.
Her drive to help others was amazing. Unfortunately, I learned more about her after her passing than I did when she was alive. The bits I did get were from older brother who kept me posted on where she had been and what she was doing from time to time.
I apologize for rambling. I feel so awful that something like this happened to such a good person and to a good family.
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